Always in Threes
The trouble that today has brought me was nothing short of remarkable. I'm just happy that Fate decided to get all three kicks to the head done quickly, so I can get on with my life.
The day started relatively normal. A morning in the office, and before I knew it we were seeking lunch. We decided to head down to Deerfoot Meadows so that Glen could fulfill his geek. While there I couldn't help but play around with a fantasy of my own. It wasn't long and we were finished with the hour TheMan® gave us and we headed back to the office. A few minutes into the voyage, and Mark found that he could not close his window.
Rage took me at this point. I was pissed that I had just dropped enough cash to feed a dozen Africans for a year on this car, and now something as simple as closing the window was going to get me. All afternoon I wondered about it, and ended up leaving early so that I could go home and fix my car.
As soon as I pulled the Le Sabre into the garage and I was after it. I'm no stranger to the doors of these domestics, as my Caddy often gave me trouble. It wasn't long and unsavoury words were coming from my mouth as I covered myself in some amazingly sticky sound proofing silicone, a bizaar window lubricant and an array of cuts and scrapes. I soon found the defect to be a peice of white plastic about the size of my last knuckle on my pinky finger. At this point, I knew I would not be able to just zip to the part store and pick one of these up without signing over my first born and my left leg, so I set myself towards getting my car mobile, if unsecure, and going to a wrecker tomorrow for the part.
I cleaned up the shop, and threw all the tools I had used up until this point into the back seat; I know I will need those bad boys tomorrow to pick apart the donator that will give me parts tomorrow. I closed the offending door knowing full well that everyone in the world is going to notice that half of the inside, including the glass, is missing. I pulled the garage door closed behind me, and proceeded to throw the lock for the evening. At that moment the key decided to break on me.
Disbelief took me at this point. How could something as inconvenient as this happen to me twice in one day? Luckily I hadn't yet completely thrown the deadbolt, and I was able to use brute force and ignorance the door to open the door to my shop. I had just finished throwing the guts of my car into the back seat, so I new it was road ready, but I did take a second to remove anything I would miss if someone did decide to steal my car.
A quick trip to Home Depot, and I was back in the shop ready to change out my lock. I had a very hardened resolve by this point, so the fact that the new lock didn't fit, didn't even phase me as I chiseled out large sections of my door. Lady luck also made sure that I didn't have the lock in there just right when I was done, so that I would have to take it apart and put it all back together again.
Once again, I was happy. I knew that my problems were fixed enough for the moment, and there was a strong desire within me to BBQ up a steak I took out in the morning. I skipped up the stairs and made my way to the bathroom all the time thinking about the smell of the sizzling steak on the BBQ. I couldn't believe how messy I had got. I was mainly covered in whatever black sticky product the General Motors Company used to seal up their doors. Soap didn't seem to make a dent in the stuff covering my forarms and face, but I did manage to soak my hands long enough to get them to a sanitary level where I could cook food. I pushed down on the lever of my newly renovated sink, and the drain didn't open.
Defeat took me at this point. Before I fully acknowleged the problem, I had a plan of attack, but I knew that today definitely was not my day. With the help of a trusty screwdriver I pried the drain open, and before long I had the innards of the sink pulled apart. It was easy enough to fix, but the coincidental spit in the face elightened me that fate can be a real bitch.
